Paul, the Know-it-all

This morning in church,
Tried to listen for your will.
But my heart simply fluttered
Off the window sill.

She flew over
The hanging cloud.
She made her way back
When Pastor prayed out loud.

When they prayed for change,
I searched my mind.
What do I want?
What is there to find?

Paul.

I hate this guy.
I hate this Paul.
He’s way too intense.
A self-righteous know-it-all.

Why would I want to be him?

Paul was passionate.
A hard-core monk.
And all-too-ready
To unpack his junk.

He was confident.
A writer.
A traveler.
A speaker.
Uncompromising
And truly a seeker.

Courageous and bold.
Boaster of weakness.
Loyal and hungry.
Submitter to meekness.

I want to be a Paul.
Tamer of sin.
Lover of all.
Overcome where I’ve been.

Saul was blinded.
But Paul can see.
Struck by Jesus.
Suddenly set free.

Saul had everything.
Or so he thought.
But Paul understood
How grace is wrought.

It’s not something to study.
Or something to attain.
It simply falls
Like a gentle rain.

You can’t buy it.
It’s not earned or learned.
It is experienced.
Selfish life turned.

You either kneel in the fullness
Of Jesus’ shed blood.
Or stand with fear
Of the impending flood.

Paul chose against his past.
Saul repented from his brilliant plan.
Paul rose to the impossible task.
Saul was buried by Paul’s own hand.

“Die to yourself and follow me.”
That’s what I want.

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