Fried Chicken and Dirty Dishes

Grandma’s kitchen.
Forgotten fried chicken.
Used, cold skillet.
Shimmering in congealed bacon fat.
Brown, yellow, orange matted carpet.
Clutter. Papers. Fly swatter. Plants.
Pepsi bottles.
Hum of the dingy fridge.
Greasy haze of low-light air.
Stale-flavored ice that can’t be cracked with mere teeth.
Dish upon dish.
So much that the sink disappears and one large dinner plate/utensil mound erupts from the countertop.
Dripping faucet plinking against tin.
Sad, somber, soft.
Dark, dirty, dull.
A small photo soaking in the developer of my brain.
Your watery image takes shape and fades quick.
You existed. I remember.

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For My Cowgirl

Another repost poem. Happy birthday, Pencil Princess!

The picture on the post is Lilli wearing my dad’s old straw cowboy hat.


Before I had a girl,
I thought she’d steal my husband’s heart.
I was scared of sharing,
Expecting battle from the start.

What I didn’t know
Is that she stole my heart instead.
I wanted Dad to heap
Love and kisses on her head.

My daughter is my strength.
She’s taught me more than I could teach.
She’s my tough defender
When I’m sick or sad or weak.

She’s my will, she’s my power.
She’s my endless, eternal drive.
She’s the reason I get up.
She’s the reason I’m still alive.

Before I had a girl,
I didn’t understand
How much I’d love another girl.
I’m her biggest fan.


Love you, Cowgirl.

Patched-up Monster

Run my fingers along these stitches
My slick, sick skin in pale, pink patches
Red scars, dark dreams and seams
Snagged-up tissue in small light catches

If I’m a patched-up monster
Then what does that make you?
You are my creator
Working in sin and sinew

I acknowledge my birth and life
But I wish you wouldn’t have bothered
Especially when you hate
That which you have fathered

I pity us, this reckless wreck
Wreaking wrong, prescribing pain
Spent my life to break your neck
On the hope of a rope in ending insane

You meant to make me perfect
But don’t know what you’re doing
You played around with delicate parts
Left this bloody monster in ruin

I survive, pieced from scraps
Forgotten flesh upon the floor
You die of loneliness
But I live to rise once more

Blank Page

When the world sharpens me to a
fighting, biting, writing point
.
You are the velvet, toothy paper on which I wrestle.

The soft place that stores my hurt and heart.

I’m sorry.
Thank you.

You never tear.
Even with my harsh words and unrestrained pain.

Your blank page is a fluffy-white cloud of kindness and medicine.

Conclusions

You draw conclusions
Like ragged curtains
Assume that I feel
Pain that is real
Un-hidden in the place
Where hurt lands

But I’m injured inside
Bruises subside
Too deep to detect it
No surface affected
Clues coincide
Chaos will abide

Down to the core
Heart of the sore
Poison pill, weakened will
Infected ill, quivering quill
You kill me with your words
I rocket to the ground like gunned-down birds

Everything you say
Is trapped inside my brain
I try to let it go
But you race to reload
I will say thanks to you
Now that I’m dead, I’m bulletproof

Fool

Feeling like a fool because I cannot control
The dull, shaking razor I hold to my soul

Standing above the overflowing sink
I wipe the steamed mirror as I hold on the brink

Cut the hair, but not the skin
Hold back blood and shave on a grin

Smiles are money that buy you a life
But honesty is the sharpened knife

You may die quick, but you’ll die free
I’d rather go now than fake what I’ll be

The only thing that slips away
Is the person you thought you had to play

Kill that, Darling. Twist the blade.
You will only sleep in the bed you’ve made.

Be your own person. Live your own choice.
Write your name in the fog and raise that cutting voice.

Model Behavior

gangly legs dangle
hanging at strange angles
new-fangled angels
spangled and strangled
littered with bangles
privileged with physical advantage
yet starving for life without baggage
damaged and ravaged
mangled and managed
with makeshift bandages
wrangle your courage
disentangle this bondage
dissolve this marriage
to branded, handled beauty

Long Live Love

Long-lived love is like–
Marriage is like–
Coming home to a small beach shack.

I built it.
With my hands, skills and know-how.
Outta stuff I had.

Most people can’t rough it.
It isn’t pretty to look at.
But it’s comfortable. It has everything I need.

I always wanted to live on the beach.
I am proud to live here.
I wouldn’t live anywhere but this place.

And when the storm hits?
We may have to pick up the pieces.
But. We’re gonna be here when it’s over and we know how to build.


The beach is where you can see the edge of the world.

Woods

I went with my family and a friend last night to see Venice Theatre‘s production of Into the Woods. Such a great show. I’m so glad we went.

First, Venice Theatre has such great shows. For a community theatre, in an area littered with community theatre, you might think this smaller-community budget and/or stage might suffer, but you’d be wrong. More theatre only seems to foster better theatre! Here in Florida, at least.

Last night, the summer stock production for high school and college students opened. It was so well done. The sets, costumes, lighting and SOUND! The sound team at Venice is professional and detailed. The baby cries sounded like they came from the stinking fake baby. Woah! Impressed!

The witch. Oh, the witch. She’s probably my favorite character. I am the witch. Every mother is the witch. Wanting to hold onto your child. Willing to go anywhere, do anything: fetch white cows, gold shoes and red capes (or make others go get them) to save your relationship with your child. Misguided as she may be, we can all relate. And Alyssa Pasick portrayed the witch with heart, passion, emotion and a well-trained voice. She was so amazing. I cried during all of her songs. She was moving, compelling and so beautiful. Just absolutely perfect. Hilarious, as well!

The baker’s wife. Hannah Beatt was enchanting. Absolutely adorable, lovely. Loved her. She sang beautifully and she was also moving. Loved her voice.

The mysterious man. Kenneth Glesge. What a great voice! I hadn’t heard this young man sing before and he just blew me away. He played the part (well beyond his years) with maturity and grace. He really understood the character. He nailed the whimsical nature, but also the emotional depth of this smaller role. Well done! So impressed. I would have loved to see you play the Wolf! 😀 In our production, back in KC, our Mysterious Man doubled in the Wolf role. Quite a stretch! But this guy, last night, could have done it!

I loved most aspects of this well done show. The pacing was just right. All the voices of the main cast were superb! There were a few times I couldn’t hear un-mic’d actors, but that is to be expected. I know the show well enough to not miss the dialogue or song lyrics, it was a minor (just a few seconds) glitch. Every character was so committed to their role, even through minor (super minor) tech issues.

This show was excellent by any standard. Professional, semi-professional, adult vs. high school/college. I loved it! Brava! Bravo! Congrats to the cast and crew of Into the Woods! You deserved your standing ovation on opening night.

So glad we have this gem of a theatre right here in our backyard! So lucky! And they are very kind to their actors and volunteers! Love you, VT!