Fragility of Choice

Beautiful weakness.

Question: If God created us, why didn’t he make us stronger, better, less susceptible to weakness and evil?

Answer (in the form of a question lol): If we can’t be tempted, how can we choose? If everything is easy, is that really a choice?

I think it’s beautiful to be weak. To struggle. To choose good, even though it’s hard. To fight the good fight of faith (1 Timothy 6:12). Even to fall. Because there is grace.

Question: If God created us, why did He have to save us?

Answer (maybe): God gave us a choice so that we may love Him freely and honor Him of our own choosing. Come to Him with freedom. Love Him because we want to. He knew that to give us choice, He would have to make us fragile. Capable of falling. But He gave us Christ because:
1. He loved us
2. He knew we would need help

So. We can stand on Christ alone if we fall. That’s gorgeous.

We are fragile. We are weak. We are beautiful.
We are wonderfully and fearfully made.
We are free. We are loved. We are saved.

Thoughts? Opinions? Insight?

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Christ=Love

Philippians 1:9-10 NIV

And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, 10 so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ,


So our love may abound.

That’s not a selfish love for ourselves. That is love for our neighbor. Fellow man, global partner, friend, boss, co-worker, passerby, merchant, customer, homeless man on the street.

Do u think if you knew why a person was a jerk that you could love them more? If you knew why a man was homeless could you hold his hand? Offer him food? Wash his feet? If you heard his story, could you see his heart?

Our depth of insight is shallow. We don’t care why someone takes advantage of us, we just know that we have to fight for our rights! That is the American way. We were founded on this principle.

The knowledge Christ gives us of human relationship is deep and unending. And Christ asks us to overlook our rights to reach the heart of man. He forfeited his rights on the cross to reach us. Right?


I saw a man on the street holding a sign this week as I made my way to the hospital to drop off my collected labs.

AMERICA NEEDS JESUS CHRIST

We surely do. We need Christ. Christ=Love. Love=Unconditional care. Amen, Brother.

Happy Bday, Baby

Tomorrow is my husband’s birthday. Happy birthday, Honey! 🙂

Guy isn’t the best husband I’ve ever met or known. But I don’t see what everyone’s husband is like at home. So, I sit and write, corrected. He may be the best. Maybe. But, for sure, he’s the best husband I’ve ever had. (I’ve only had the one.)

Guy is very caring. Listens more than most. Can be very understanding. Is emotional. Sentimental. Loving. Sexy. Affectionate! Flawed.

Temperamental! Demanding, at times. Sometimes selfish.

Guy is still the funniest person I personally know. Perhaps just as funny as most celebrities. And just as creative and talented, given the chance.

He’s brilliant, in his way. Sensitive to the world. And darn handsome IMO.

He puts up with my issues/PTSD/abuse history. He also accepts our meager living due to my artistic passions and multiple difficulties with physical and mental health.

And. Guy is striving toward a relationship with God, Christ and the Holy Spirit. This is his most wonderful and inspiring trait right now. I see him trying. Struggling. Holding a light of inspection over his life to see how to make it better. For me, for Lilli and for himself. But most of all, to serve God.

I see this desire. I see his yearning. I pray for him every day that it will grow and that he will change. Not for me, but for himself and for God.

I love you, Honey. I’m so glad you were born. That you survived. That you’re here with me, that we created Lilli, and that we have this place, together. I know I’m not perfect. Neither of us are. But we have each other and that’s a lot. I’m so glad your parents loved each other, created your life, and that you are here against all odds. They would be proud. And I know my mom loves you, like you were her own. So many people do love you. You have done good in the world and I praise you for that. HBD, Guy.

You saved me from a life of loneliness, isolation and destruction. Thank you.

Trouble

I’ve heard some friends and bloggers talk about their weakness, illness or sadness today. I am praying for you. I hear you. God is by you. Do not despair.

Haiku for You


Thankful for trouble.
It teaches me endurance.
And hard times won’t last.


“Please, heal me, O Lord!”
He said, “Grace is sufficient.”
I embraced my ill.


Kingdom come! I’m weak!
His power is made perfect
When I require him.


Be patient. Hold on.
His perfect timing will come.
And trouble will go.


Amen.

Christ-ku

Bleeding on a cross.
He never did a thing wrong.
And justice for All.


Sacrifice of blood.
Offered to the Undeserved.
From man’s only chance.


Do you want to die?
Find the only way to live.
Die to yourself now.


Last shall be first, huh?
I don’t accept the logic.
Why am I waiting?


Meek shall inherit.
Watch that wild horse be tamed.
Modern miracle.

Step Off

Step off intention
Abandon inhibition
Get radical

Accept direction
Receive conviction
LiveLOVE without limits

Reject temptation
Rebuke humiliation
Give grace to get it

Mute deception
Cure infection
Hear truth

Find education
Look for definition
Read

Forget exaltation
Embrace correction
Kneel
Crawl
Walk
Run
Fly

Care
And be cared for
Submit

To My Stones

If my prayers are only whispers
Of a wish list in the sky,
Then I have only brought the world
Another selfish guy.

If my prayers are only sweet-sung praises
And I neglect to love,
What good does it do to believe
In a God in heaven above?

If I call myself a Christian,
But I never read the word,
I’m just as lost as the person
Who’s never even heard.

We have the benefit of access,
But most of it’s for show.
If you don’t water actions with words
How’re they supposed to grow?

No good can come from us.
We rely on Christ alone.
If we aspire to be more than dirt
Accept the seeds which He has thrown.

Am I rocky soil?
Full of weeds?
Easily purchased?
Lost in deeds?

I’m the house built
On sinking sand.
I’m the seed unsown
On fallow land.

Tear me down, Lord.
Strip her to the stones.
Down to the ground,
Then build from the bones.

Rise from the ashes
Of this burnt shell.
Give me new eyes
And a story to tell.

A story of your glory
And the mercy you’ve given.
Erase the person I was
And draw the Christ who’s risen.

Plant those flowers,
Fruit on the vine.
Remain in me.
Bring the sun to shine.

Make this garden-home
A welcoming place.
When they look at me
Let them see your face.

Poor in Spirit

“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom…”

I can’t have a bank account
From the First National Sermon on the Mount.
The beatitudes are all about attitude.
The first blessing that Christ’s addressing
Is the condition of my heart.

Do I understand
What God had planned?
Jesus bent for Hell and sent to tell
His sacrificial story of offered glory
For the entire planet.

Do I require
The rock that is higher?
The grace that I taste
Is paid by a price that is prised
By flesh.

The question is
Do I think I need it?

Poor in spirit
Refers to lack of wealth
Not in property or coins
But in spiritual health

The answer is:
Everyone’s sick.
Overcoming sin
Is more than just a trick.

No magic here.
Someone had to die.
Jesus was born
To bring King-dom nigh.

Accepting mercy
Is easy when I need it.
Giving up pride
Is hard when I feed it.

A beggar knows
Where his hope is born.
A sinner knows
How the curtain was torn.

A beggar asks
For what he needs to live.
The King with the riches
Is the one to give.

If I think I’m rich?
Never need excused?
Forgiveness is necessary.
All stand accused.

Coming to terms
With my own depravity
Is like an astronaut re-entering
Earthbound gravity.

All I have to lose
Is the illusion of control
I was never in charge
Of saving my own soul.

It’s really simple,
Not easily done.
Give up pretense.
In that, I’ve won.

There are no deposits.
I can’t act good.
I only withdraw
From the blood-soaked wood.

Thank God for His sacrifice.
Dying.
While we were still sinners.
The poor in spirit
Are the real winners
Of the kingdom.

If I’m on my knees, in dire need,
Then I appreciate the cost.
I can’t buy or bleed my way to heaven.
The price was paid for the lost
On the cross.

A poor man begs for help in street.
He knows he can’t stand on his own.
I wouldn’t want to kneel before God
Knowing I refused His loan.
I will show my receipt of divine restraint.

So. I’m poor. So poor.
In total need.
I have nothing to show.
Not one good deed.

So help me, God.
Send sweet Christ.
I accept and submit to
The Son Sacrificed.

Everyone is poor in SPIRIT before the throne of God.
All of us require the currency of Jesus.

Am Found

Thrown down
Lost my crown

Body broken
Shame unspoken

Face in the dirt
Badly hurt

I’m wrong
I failed
Mercy, please
Grace unveiled

Foot of the cross
Feet of the Christ

Unworthy to touch
Owe too much

Can’t even stand
Quivering hand

Reach out for charity
Bittersweet disparity

Hard to swallow
Hard to follow

Honey for the healing
Grace feels like stealing

I stumbled
Am humbled

Belly on the ground
Forgiveness is found

And I stand on the power of Christ alone.