Pee! The world’s on fire.

My only brother, 11 years older than me, used to sleep in late. As teens do. After being out late with his friends, he would sleep late. Also, at one point, I think he worked evenings or nights at a local gas station, so he might have been sleeping during the day for that reason.

Well, my father creeps into the hallway with an impish grin. He was in a goofy, manic phase and holds down the smoke detector test button.

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!

Except, our alarm was louder and more terrifying. Enough to make you piss your pants.

At the same time, my dad hollers down the hallway, “Pee! The world’s on fire!” Laughing his country-ass off. (One of his favorite sayings was, “I work my country ass off!” I still say that. So does my husband. LOL My husband does a perfect impersonation of my father, even though they never met, mainly because I say it exactly the way my dad used to. Love it.)

My brother comes running out of his bedroom, his long, usually-perfect, feathered hair tousled from sleep and his eyes barely open. His eyes quickly narrow even further at the sight of my dad and the rest of the family giggling maniacally.

He did not pee. He was pissed though! I think my dad just wanted him up and out!

Good times.

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First Evidence

adam god finger

First evidence of the Dad joke “Pull my finger!” LOL

That look on Adam’s face says it all. “Daaaad!” LOL

You won’t be able to see this any other way now. Sorry!

Raw

My daughter, Pencil Princess, is so funny. The other night, she asked for a Pop Tart in the morning for breakfast. I asked her if it was okay untoasted. She said, “Sure, I don’t mind Raw-p Tarts!”

I. Died!

So I asked her to draw me a Pop Tart for my blog. Isn’t it cute?  Good job, Lilli. Wish I could draw like you do. You have a natural talent for it. Your illustrations are so simple and adorable. Love your style. And wit. 🙂 ❤ You’re my best galfriend.

 

Losers

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I feel so bad! Sorry, Losers!

I was driving two weekends ago and one of my rides was from a bar. I don’t judge.

When the call came in, the lady said, “Can you come pick me up? I’m at Losers.”

Now. This bar was loud. She was drunk (thank you by the way for calling a cab!) and I *thought* she said Losers. I still don’t know this area very well. 🙂

“NO! Hoosiers!”

Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!

“Oh! Okay. I’ll be right there!”

I felt so bad. You’re not a loser, Ma’am. You just like to party.

Would you go to a bar named Losers?? A place you know you belong. LOL 😉