Anxious Axioms

Some days.
My molecules feel like flying apart.
Keeping my atoms assembled feels like a full-time affair.
Ions excited to bump around inside my body.
Buzzing like a ramshackle wasp nest hanging by a dangling, vibrating twig.
Sent swinging by the angry, kicking toddler who lives inside my ghost-of-a-heart.
Sub-atomic
Axiomatic
Nuclear bomb
Automatic
Quixotic notions about therapeutic potions
Hopeless solutions for mind pollutions
I won’t make it through this time.

I gotta stop drinking coffee.

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Cheerleader

We stand on the shoulders
Of the women who come before us
Don’t stop your loud chorus
Don’t let them ignore us
Don’t let your sister fall
Call your anthem tall
Straighten your back, lock those arms
Drop your wiles and feminine charms
They will only weigh you down, way down
Fly to the top of this pyramid
Let loose your yawp of spirit, Kid
Be a cheerleader for your own team.


Love other women.
Believe them.

work in progress

No penny I wouldn’t save
No journey I wouldn’t brave
No word left unsaid
A million tears I would shed
For your glory

No story I wouldn’t tell
Rain fire from war-torn hell
Allow me to burn
No lesson unlearned
To bring your peace

Pieces of heart
Start over with smart
Put evil away
Take out patience today
Live it all for love

Life is too hard
To avoid getting scarred
Bind these cuts
Give me guts
Sturdy my back for the fight

Right this soldier’s wrongs
Shoulder my burden with songs
Dive deep in my chest
Battle my demons to rest
Rock me down to sleep

Weep for the child I was
Made offerings for broken laws
Gave up my life
Extracted truth with a knife
Found your bright words in the night

Carved out all the cancer
Heard your sweet voice in an answer
Love is the key
Grace on your knees

Finish your work in me, please.

Patched-up Monster

Run my fingers along these stitches
My slick, sick skin in pale, pink patches
Red scars, dark dreams and seams
Snagged-up tissue in small light catches

If I’m a patched-up monster
Then what does that make you?
You are my creator
Working in sin and sinew

I acknowledge my birth and life
But I wish you wouldn’t have bothered
Especially when you hate
That which you have fathered

I pity us, this reckless wreck
Wreaking wrong, prescribing pain
Spent my life to break your neck
On the hope of a rope in ending insane

You meant to make me perfect
But don’t know what you’re doing
You played around with delicate parts
Left this bloody monster in ruin

I survive, pieced from scraps
Forgotten flesh upon the floor
You die of loneliness
But I live to rise once more

Sunset and Missing Missouri

I moved from KC, MO to Florida just over a year ago. I still miss it from time to time, even in paradise. You can only take so many palm trees before you look at them like oaks. But it’s better living off-island and near a river now! And I see pines from our place.


Watching the sunset over seas
Enjoying tropical island breeze
Is heaven

But watching this sun set behind the trees
Brings me to my thankful knees
It’s home

These trees give some permanance
To these limitless firmaments

Sailing from every temporal shore
Can leave a wanderer wanting more

Grounded with grass and pines in the yard
Make living in paradise not so hard LOL

Conclusions

You draw conclusions
Like ragged curtains
Assume that I feel
Pain that is real
Un-hidden in the place
Where hurt lands

But I’m injured inside
Bruises subside
Too deep to detect it
No surface affected
Clues coincide
Chaos will abide

Down to the core
Heart of the sore
Poison pill, weakened will
Infected ill, quivering quill
You kill me with your words
I rocket to the ground like gunned-down birds

Everything you say
Is trapped inside my brain
I try to let it go
But you race to reload
I will say thanks to you
Now that I’m dead, I’m bulletproof